A significant amount of research suggests marriages only have about a 50% chance of not ending in divorce. Considering that almost 50% of marriages end in divorce, it stands that many married couples who decide to divorce may already have children in the picture. Divorces can take a toll on a child, so it’s extremely important to help them cope any way you can. Here are some things you can do to help your child get through you and your former significant other’s separation.
One of the worst things you can do as a parent going through a divorce is to sugarcoat the situation for your child’s sake. It’s extremely important to be honest, no matter how difficult it may be. If the other parent decides to remove themselves completely from your life and your child’s life, allow your child to be angry and get their feelings out. If the other parent cancels plans, let your child say what they need to say and don’t apologize for the absence of the other parent.
Always Have a Backup Plan
If you do find that your former spouse constantly bails on your child, it’s important to have alternate plans. As frustrated as you may be with your former partner, you have to put your child’s needs first and make sure they are able to cope with the situation the best way possible. Talk with your child and set up an arrangement with them regarding how long you both will wait for the other parent to show and what you will do if they don’t show up at all.
Bring in Other Friends and Family Members
If there are other reliable and kind adults in your child’s life, try to get them involved. Ask them to tag along with the both of you for fun activities. You may even choose to ask them to take your child for the day, but not in a way that would make the child feel as though you’re trying to get rid of them. These people should be the type of people who can be role models for your child so they have someone else to turn to other than you.
Going through a divorce can be hard on you, but it can be even harder on your child. Take a look at a few of the suggestions listed above to help you and your child cope with the situation. A divorce lawyer, family mediation service, or family counselor may be able to offer alternative suggestions.