Advice from family and friends regarding where to eat dinner or where to get your hair cut is typically a good idea. But when it comes to divorce, you might be best avoiding it at all costs. Even if you think the advice your friends and family are giving you about your separation is solid, there are a few reasons to ignore it. Let’s take a look at why this is the case.
They Aren’t Aware of Your Situation
We’re all different. We all experience emotions differently, have different opinions on topics, and like different things. Similarly, no divorce situation is really ever the same. If you and your friends speak every day, they likely have a good idea of what’s going on in your life. But if you rarely speak, they’re not going to know every detail. Even if you talk to your friends and family every minute of the day, chances are they don’t know details about your assets, your finances, and your behind-closed-doors relationship. Since they don’t know all of the details, their advice might not be the best for you to follow.
They Might Not Be Lawyers
Unless your family member or friend is a divorce attorney, they’re not going to fully understand the law. Divorce law can be complex, and unless you’re trained in it, it’s tough to know what’s going on. Divorce is much more than just splitting your assets and sharing custody of children. It may even require divorce mediation. They also don’t know how much it’s going to cost you exactly as each case is different. In the United States, the cost of a divorce varies from $15,000 to about $42,500. Your friends and family aren’t able to give you an idea of what might happen in court or what the decisions might be as they truly don’t know.
They’re Not Objective
People work with mediators and attorneys they don’t know because they’re emotionally separated from the situation. An attorney or lawyer will act with an open and objective mind. They’re not going to take sides and will be completely honest with both parties. Friends and family will have an emotional connection to the situation and may feel like you’re wrong in the situation or that your partner is. Listening to their advice might not be anything close to what the judge has to say at the end of your court process.
Divorce can be messy, but it can be even messier when you bring your friends and families into it. While it may be tempting to take everything they have to say to heart, do your best to avoid listening to their advice about your impending divorce.